If you're my mother and you're reading this, you're a very petite, intelligent public school teacher. Also, you're shaking your head and picturing me at six years old, terrified and furious on a rickety bridge attraction at Storyland. There was a lot of anxiety involved with that specific rickety bridge. I remember, very clearly, having the thought "This bridge is poorly constructed. I'm going to fall and die and I don't understand why my parents are encouraging me to walk across this bridge, which is clearly...rickety."
The fact that the "rickety" part was supposed to be the "fun" part escaped me completely. It just seemed like a trick to kill dumb kids. That day, in having a good laugh at my difficulty on said bridge, my dad remarked "she's no goat!"
And, oh man, did that stick. You know how you get labeled as being really good or really bad at something when you're a kid and it becomes woven into your identity? Well, for years and years I negative self-talked myself out of any situation that would require the physical dexterity to climb or balance on something. Those years of gymnastics classes were great, by the way.
In the beginning of this summer, however, I was asked to go for a hike and, feeling empowered and trusting that my companion was a specifically non-judgmental individual, I said yes. We went up to the Blue Hills and started walking. True, I thought I was going to die in the first 15 minutes, but then it leveled out a bit. It was actually a pretty challenging trail (we thought we took the easy one...we were wrong)but I handled it well. It was such a feeling of accomplishment to succeed at doing something that I'd kind of assumed I'd be terrible at. A really great day. Maybe the best day of the year for me so far.
I did freak out once, but it was because we saw a mouse. Then I promptly realized that a mouse belongs in the forest, and I kind of don't. So...you know, get over it.
I'm still no goat, but I'm also not a nerve-wracked six year old at Storyland, which is an upgrade.
So I'd like to go on a hike today. Or go to Storyland.
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7 comments:
i hiked yesterday at boot camp! we were told we would get "less wet" traipsing through the forest. (i've only hiked up here one other time and was terrified but it turned out to be challenging and fun). i can honestly now say i have had my feet fully submerged in mud up to my ankles. balls!
Oof, I don't think I'd like hiking in the rain very much. I'm more at the 70 degrees and sunny level of expertise. You're amazing with your bootcamp stuff, lady.
You've just made me want to go to Blue Hills!
storyland! i was there all the time as a kid, and you're right, that bridge was scary. I think that was the point maybe, but in that case that point is stupid.
AGREED.
for some weird reason everytime we'd go to storyland my mom would want us to all cram into the little old woman who lived in a shoe house for a picture.
i wonder if the attractions still look like they was made in 1973.
Erin, this post cracked me up. I was no goat at that age, too. Come to think of it, I'm still not much of one.
Oh, and after all these years, I still very much love reading your writing. :)
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